What You Need to Know About Living Authentically

“So you just write on a blog? Is that even stable?”

I looked back at my friend’s roommate with his eyebrow raised waiting for an answer, only for another voice behind me to chime in and say, “Yeah if you’re a hot girl.”

Nice, I’ve just been minimized to my career aspects and also my features.

Small Meant Safe

I spent the majority of my life feeling like I needed to make myself smaller to fit in places that weren’t even big enough to hold me.

In college, when people found out I was studying English and Journalism, it seemed to always be met with, “Yeah, well, good luck finding a job after you graduate.” In their eyes, my interests and goals didn’t fit the standard of what success looked like.

Failure and rejection were not new concepts to me, but for a long time, I allowed their presence to determine who I was. My thoughts were clouded by goals and expectations that were defined by others instead of myself. I led a life of dishonesty and prioritized the service of others over my own.

I even had a friend tell me, “You spend so much time making other people happy that you don’t even care what to think about yourself.”

That stung.

You Get to Define It

Looking back, I wish I spent more of my time being true to myself. My “best life” didn’t even feel like it was mine to begin with. If I wasn’t so stuck in avoidance and fear, I would’ve had the opportunity to start living my life freely. However, I wasn’t going to let my failures and past define my current experience and success.

It’s no secret that a person’s inner thoughts influence how they see themselves. But here’s the thing, emotions and thoughts don’t define a person as a whole. A single thought does not attribute to the story and character of a person’s whole life.

Consider this, are you being intentional with your thoughts? What thoughts come up when you think of yourself? Can you see the perspective from an opposite point of view?

Small Steps and Conscious Effort

While overcoming fear and failure is not an overnight feat, realigning your thoughts allows an opportunity to find what you prioritize and what you are willing to let go of. Thought work isn’t complicated, but it does take some practice and patience to identify what you’re are experiencing within.

This is a lifelong practice that only gets better over time. Remember that through intention and a shift in perspective, you can take further steps towards embracing your most authentic self.

Chat soon,

Mary