What if it was possible to love yourself so fiercely that nothing could shake it off? What if I told you it was possible to feel wholly charged with the light and warmth that is already emulating inside you?
Self-love is not a one-size-fits-all answer, but there are things we can do to help ourselves find it ranging from finding our “why” to being still with our mind and body.
I will be sharing bits of my story along with helpful tips and advice that will help you discover your own path to self-love. Read on to learn more about my story of finding self-love and how I went from heartbreak to healing.
HOW IT STARTED
After a terrible relationship in college, I decided it was time for me to start loving myself. It was the moment when the pain I carried for so many years felt so unbearable that I knew something had to change. The breakup was the catalyst for my healing and the beginning of my self-love journey.
I spent my teenage years and early adulthood making parts of myself smaller in exchange for a love I didn’t believe I was capable of giving to myself.
YOU ONLY GET ONE, RIGHT?
Growing up, I found comfort in the idea that life would feel complete once I found that one big true love. If Carrie Bradshaw could find it, so could I, right?
You see the thing is, I thought that’s what I was supposed to need in life in order to feel complete. But the more I kept trying, the less whole I felt. From those years, I lost touch with myself and tried to make up for it by participating in relationships and friendships I thought would help me bring it back.
I don’t know if I was expecting someone to show up with a big silver platter of all the things that were supposed to make me happy, but I can assure you that the platter never came. But there was one thing, though, that showed up every day quietly waiting for me to welcome them in.
IT’S ALWAYS BEEN YOU, BABY
It was the moment I decided to sit still and be honest with myself that I realized the love I was looking for was within me, waiting to be nurtured this whole time. I tried to research ways to get past the discomfort and frustration that followed suit. I was most upset with myself for not seeing myself sooner, but it wasn’t until I stumbled upon Headspace that I realized the discomfort is necessary. I believe we call those “growing pains.” ?
Meditation was hard in the beginning. Sitting still and allowing things to simply “be” was not something I thought I would be keen to. Frankly, from the first day to the next 3 months after, I was ready to throw in the towel, but there was a small voice nagging me in my head to keep going. Then suddenly, something started to click.
I began to feel a rising energy build in my chest and I then unconsciously released a slow hum. It was then at that moment that I began to allow myself to feel safe and let go.
Do you ever wish you felt less awkward in front of the camera? Does your body tense up and your thoughts go blank when you think about where to put your hands? Keep reading to find 3 simple tips to feel less awkward in front of the camera and some poses you can practice right now!
Imagine this: you are at the beach or at lunch with your friend, and your friend tells you that you look so cute and they want to take a pic of you. You look over and suddenly you don’t know where to put your hands and you’re wondering if you’re tilting your head just the right amount to get your good angle in.
I get it, posing in front of the camera can be an awkward experience! From hand placement to posing, there’s a lot to consider when the camera shutter clicks. I’m here to tell you that it doesn’t have to be awkward and it can be as easy as 1, 2, 3.
You Need to Ask Yourself Why You Want to Look Confident in Front of the Camera
Here’s the thing, in order to get comfortable in front of the camera and be photo-ready every time, it needs to start with confidence and a little preparation.
Unfortunately, so many people don’t feel comfortable in front of the camera because it isn’t something they do all the time. Do you remember the first time you started doing something? I remember the first time I rode a bike. I was terrified of falling and bruising my knees.
My fear was coming from a place of doubt and inexperience. The awkwardness you feel in front of the camera can share those same feelings. However, with some practice and these 3 simple tips to look less awkward in front of the camera, you will be camera confident in no time!
When I would scroll through magazines and Instagram, I would look at models and think, “Wow, it must be nice to look that good so effortlessly. I could never do that.” I would sigh at myself and put my head down in shame with how uncomfortable I felt with myself.
That way of thinking was causing me to inadvertently put myself down. I was making myself smaller because I saw myself and my abilities as small.
Reframe Your Thinking
Beauty is subjective and the only opinion you will ever need in order to feel confident in front of the camera was your own! I didn’t need to hold myself to an obscure standard based on what I saw on the internet.
Instead of thinking, “I could never do that,” I switched my thinking to, “I can do that too.” Remember, another person’s beauty does not replace your own.
I know what you’re thinking, “that sounds great and all, but how exactly am I supposed to do that? This isn’t going to be another self-help article on ‘believing’ in myself is it?”
By practicing positive self-talk, you build confidence and create a stronger relationship with yourself. Allow your beauty to show from the inside out.
There are also a number of benefits to positive self-talk! You can find some benefits from Healthline here.
If you are interested in an article on how you can speak to yourself more positively, let me know in the comments! Or drop me a note on Instagram @soyleaf.
Seeing the beautiful models in magazines and on the internet then became my source of inspiration to learn how they pose. While beauty and art are subjective, there are a few technical things you can follow to look more natural and poised in front of the camera.
I save posts on Instagram and create boards on Pinterest to reference poses and shoots I like. Seeing how others do it help me get a sense of what works for me and the looks I want to achieve.
Don’t have time to look at poses right now? I got you, here are two super easy poses you can practice right now:
Put Your Best Foot Forward (Literally)
For full-body and outfit shots, I like to take some photos with one foot in front of the other. Usually, my front foot is pointing towards the camera. This pose makes my body appear longer and adds dimension to the photo. By adding more shape within the frame, the photos look more interesting and the subject (i.e. model in frame) doesn’t appear flat in the photo.
If you are not sure what to do with your hands, then see how you can make triangles with your body. Triangles also add dimension to the photo and overall can catch the eye to look more interesting.
When I pose for a full-body photo, I try to put my hands on my hips or belt-line to make triangles with my arms. Making triangles with your arms also works for upper body photos and sitting down photos.
Now that you’ve got your poses saved in advance, it’s time to strut your stuff! The quickest way to get comfortable in front of a camera and other people is to get comfortable with yourself first; this is where the practice comes in.
Confidence is earned through consistent practice and intentional effort. In order to get clarity on your camera confidence, you need to set time aside to practice the poses you like and master the angles you feel most comfortable in.
I suggest choosing 2 poses you really like and committing at least 30 minutes this week to understand why the pose works for you and mimicking those poses in front of the mirror. Pay attention to the subject’s hand placement and how their body and head are angled. Remember that those poses are a guide, so feel free to adjust with what makes you feel most comfortable. Listen to how your body responds to the poses and approach the practice with kindness and curiosity.
Like any new practice, posing in front of the camera can feel uncomfortable and awkward. There are a lot of steps to consider and a lot of elements to account for before the shutter clicks. However, by cultivating a stronger relationship with yourself, seeking poses that inspire you, and practicing those poses in front of the mirror, you will be ready in front of the camera in no time! Need extra help? Find me on Instagram to read more topics on body positivity, confidence, and photography.
Remember, you got this.
Always,
Mary
IF YOU LIKED THIS POST, YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE THESE POSTS:
What if you could replace fear and doubt with belief and self-love?
Imagine this: you wake up one day and all your fears and doubts become yesterday’s worries. You wake up confident ready to face the world. What if I told you it was possible to feel like that every day?
Each New Day is A New Opportunity to Reinvent Yourself
I’ve always loved the idea that each new day is an opportunity to reinvent ourselves, or even better lean closer to our most authentic selves. While this isn’t an overnight accomplishment, there are things you can do to lean in closer.
Think about things you’ve done that help you feel relaxed and fulfilled.
Writing and photography have helped me cultivate a stronger relationship with myself. They both put me in a meditative state, learning more about my needs and most especially pain points I didn’t realize I had.
Think about a moment you were doing something and it put you “in the zone.” Now think about the time you first started and how bad you were at it. But you kept going right?
Show Up For Yourself Every Day
If we want to grow, we have to show up every day. We need to show up even if it’s hard, even if we don’t feel like it. But the secret is that you don’t have to be perfect every time, you just have to show up and keep going.
Ask yourself this today: How can I access my thoughts in a way that allows my true authentic self to speak?
What feelings come up when you take a moment of stillness? Take a moment to pay attention to your breathing and scan through your body. Think of what your authentic self is saying and use that as your drive to keep going. Take a moment to reflect and dive into your thoughts.
How can I access my thoughts in a way that allows my true authentic self to speak?
Remember to take moments throughout your day to pause and reflect on the moments that added joy to your life. Pay attention to that feeling and allow yourself to follow it.
Always,
Mary
IF YOU LIKE THIS POST, YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE THESE POSTS:
Now that we’re into the start of the new year, many of us have new goals we want to accomplish this year. A few of my goals are: sticking to my morning routine, meditating twice a day, and getting my body moving outside every day. Over the last few years, a few of my goals have led me to live a more fruitful and fulfilling life. For example, starting a self-love blog led me here to you!
If you are on a self-improvement journey or are just starting out, here are 3 apps that will help your self-growth.
Headspace is an app that offers courses and guides on meditation. I have been using Headspace since 2017. It was the crux of my self-development journey that made me want to lead a better life for myself. While there are many great meditation guides and apps to use, Headspace has always been the one app that has helped me garner consistency and peace of mind in my everyday life.
With its relatable course topics and easy-to-understand animations, Headspace makes the meditative experience fun while helping you ease into your mindful goals.
Libby provides eBooks, audiobooks, and many more reading materials from your local public library for free if you have a valid library card. I often borrow readings from the self-help section of the library to learn more about improving my life and to write content for you.
With the ease of the Libby app, I don’t always have to go to the library for the week if I don’t want to; all that I need can be found digitally through the app.
If you’re interested in seeing a list of my favorite self-improvement books, you can access them through this link. The availability of the books will depend on if your local public library will have them. This is a great alternative to buying new books online and is so easy to use!
I think we all need a space where we can all envision our current goals and track our progress with them. I use Notion to organize almost every facet of my life and I can assure you it has made all the difference.
Last year, I made it a goal to journal every day. Whether it was a full-page entry or a whole two sentences, each day had to be filled with one entry. The purpose of this goal was to 1.) get myself to start writing again and 2.) track my daily emotions and observe what I am being reactive towards.
The great thing about Notion is that it allows so much versatility and space to create vision boards, journal entries, and so many tools to help you along with any goal you have in mind. It has organized my life for the better and also helped me to understand and process day-to-day emotions through journaling.
That said, I’ve actually been creating a Notion dashboard for others to use for free and will be releasing it this year. Can’t wait? Go ahead and grab my self-reflection checklist here for free and be the first to know when my Notion dashboard is ready!
Final Thoughts
While our goals are here to help us build our lives, always remember that even small steps should still be seen as progress. When I started my journey through meditation, I could not even move past 3 minutes of silence, but I kept going. You can read more about that journey here.
With journaling and reading, I struggled to work past the 30-minute mark, but I kept going. Some days are going to be harder than others, but want me to let you in on a little secret?
Just start.
By envisioning the best version of yourself and committing to just starting, you are already a step ahead. Be easy on yourself and remember that 5 minutes of one thing every day is still a step in the right direction.
I hope you found these 3 apps helpful in strengthening your self-improvement journey and goals in 2022. Have you tried these or other apps in your self-improvement journey? Tell me about it in the comments.
*This is a sponsored post. As always, thoughts and opinions are my own.
Creating a healthy meal plan is such an essential and great way to stick to a routine and save time for the week. Recently I collaborated with Meal Prep Sunday Services to try out some of the best meals they have prepared for a week of meal prepping. Here is what I found out:
What is Meal Prep Sunday Services?
Meal Prep Sunday Services is a San Diego-based meal delivery service that sends personalized prepared meals typically every Sunday, but they’re able to accommodate deliveries to Monday and Tuesday if needed. Each delivery comes in a custom insulated bag containing an ice pack from a local delivery driver.
You are also able to text the driver directly if you have any issues or need to inform them of any extra information. The process to have my meals delivered was quick and easy!
On the day of, my driver let me know in the morning that my meals were going to be delivered later that day and shared their ETA. I thanked them for the update and they were so kind to respond that it was their pleasure.
Are you based outside of San Diego? No worries! They also offer delivery in Orange, Los Angeles, Riverside, and Imperial counties.
What Type of Meals Do They Offer?
Each meal is customized to your needs. When you sign up and share your physical information, fitness goals, and needs, they will prepare your meals based on that.
All of their meals are made from fully organic produce and provided by local suppliers. They pride themselves on serving meals that are never frozen and prepared with free-range chicken and grass-fed beef.
Prepared by a team of culinary professionals, their meals changed off of a rotating menu using selected and high-quality ingredients from fresh seasonal recipes. Each recipe is based on your needs so if you have any specific allergies or preferences, they modify each meal to best serve you.
If you are anything like me, I like to try out a handful of different things to see what I like. All the meals I received came fresh and were easy to heat up. They offer the option to heat up your meal in either the oven or microwave. I heated my meals in the microwave because it was simple and easy for me. All of their meals come in a microwave-safe container so you don’t have to worry about doing extra dishes or if your container will melt.
How Can Meal Prep Sunday Services Help My Fitness Goals?
If you’re interested in leading a healthier lifestyle, Meal Prep Sunday Services offers a workout plan that is synced with your fitness goals for 90 days. This is already included with your menu plan and bases your training on what will best suit those goals.
How Do I Sign Up?
If you’re interested in joining Meal Prep Sunday Services and would like to save time and money with this San Diego-based business, you can sign up through their website here. Click on the “Get Started” button and input your information through the guided questionnaire. From their website, you can use the CODE ” 1st ” for 50% off your first order.
Final Thoughts
Overall, my experience with Meal Prep Sunday Services was very delightful and I would recommend them to anyone who is interested in saving the headache from meal planning, especially if you are new to it.
